Tim and Kathy Keller’s runaway bestseller for, he says, no two people are compatible.Quoting Duke University Ethics professor Stanley Hauerwas, he explains why: “We never know whom we marry; we just think we do.But I did expect there to be a of some sort, some kind of conversational fireworks which would single this person out from everyone else in the midst of my everyday conversations. Arranged marriages statistically fare as well as love-match marriages and give us an alternative viewpoint from which to consider our expectations that “chemistry” is a helpful (or necessary) indicator of compatibility. Willoughby comments: “Arranged marriages start cold and heat up and boil over time as the couple grows.
There would be some kind of chemistry, some kind of instant attraction.To bring you the best content on our sites and applications, we partner with third party advertisers to serve personalized digital ads.Those advertisers use tracking technologies to collect information about your activity on our sites and applications and across the Internet and your other apps.And then, somehow, our paths crossed again, and I found myself interested in getting to know him.We started dating, even though I had put him firmly in the category of Not My Type.For the guy in the horrid jacket may have more to him than first meets the eye, and the list of non-negotiables we pray for in a marriage partner may be packaged in a different wrapper than what we expect.My now-husband asked the second-worst pick-up line on the day we first met, but he saved the WORST one for much later on in our relationship.He wasn’t — and yet he had a quiet strength that felt like a harbor.Secondly, though, I believe I did not give him a chance because I was expecting a different chemistry.I was not naïve enough to think that the instant attraction would necessarily be positive.I fully expected there might be an Elizabeth-Bennet-and-Mr.-Darcy-type situation where there was instant chemistry, even if it was negative at first. Hardwood is slower to catch aflame, but it burns longer.