You already have the first step down—you clicked on the article and you’ve recognized you’re ready to start adulting—click through for the others.
Love Yourself First It seems obvious, but you can’t expect to spread love (or even like) to someone else unless you adore yourself first.
It’s cool to have standards and be particular, but it becomes a problem when that pickiness is the main reason you’re still single.
“What's going to happen is you're going to end up with a person that you made up on a list and you're not going to have any compatibility later on... Since we’re talking about adulthood here, it’s also important to think of the long-term future, rather than just the next couple of months.
Things like that should be on your list, not ‘he's 5 [feet] 10 [inches], or 'he's got brown eyes.’” Be Patient Put the idea that you’re going to close this article and find the love of your life on your first meetup to the wayside (but hey, more power to you if you do). “Daters, they jump on the first person they meet because they're so tired of dating and they don't want to be doing this all their lives,” Feinstein says.
“They just go, ‘Okay, I'm attracted to this person, they're solid, they're fun to be with, so I'll go with it,' and then they find out later, 'Oh, they're cheating on me,' or whatever.
“The bottom line is, the happier and the better mood you're in, the more attractive you become,” she says.
“You can't be on a mission to find a boyfriend or girlfriend, you have to be on a mission to find happiness, because when you find that happiness it exudes, and then people will crawl out of the sky to be with YOU, and you don't really have to look that hard.”You have to become the person you want to date, she adds.
That love will then manifest into self-confidence and overall happiness which, Feinstein notes, is a major source of attraction.
If you build it (it being your self-esteem), they will come (they being your mate).