Bored bad dating stories

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They were asked to give 4 reasons for their recommendation. FULL DISCLOSURE: At the commencement of said relationship(colloquially referred to as the "first date"), each party agrees to fully disclose any current girl/boyfriends, dependent children, bizarre religious beliefs, phobias, fears, social diseases, strange political affiliations, or currently active relationships with anyone else that have not yet been terminated.Further, each party agrees to make known any deep-seated complexes and/or fanatical obsessions with pets, careers, and/or organized sports.Another problem for a he-Santa would be getting there.

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LIVING ARRANGEMENTS (occasionally known as the "Why do I bother to keep my own apartment?

" codicil): Should said relationship progress to the point where the couple spends more than four nights a week together, every effort shall be made to split the time between their respective apartments.

He often wondered what gender computers should be addressed.

To answer that question, he set up two groups of computer experts.

Once at the mall, they always seem surprised to find only Ronco products, socket wrench sets, and mood rings left on the shelves.

On this count alone, I'm convinced Santa is a woman.

Further, during the first six (6) weeks each member of said relationship agrees to attempt one spontaneous home-cooked meal or to arrange the delivery of at least one unexpected bouquet of flowers.

Following the first forty-five (45) days, both parties will return to their normal personalities.6.

DEFINITION OF RELATIONSHIP: Should said relationship proceed past the first date, both parties mutually agree to use the following terminology in describing their said "dating": For the first thirty (30) days, both parties consent to say they are "going out".

(This neither implies nor states any guarantee of exclusivity.) Following the first thirty (30) days, both parties may say they are "seeing somebody" and may be referred to by third parties as "an item".

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